Two Best Friends Play Gospel
by Hellfilly Deluxe
Summary: Completely out of ideas, The Living Tombstone and Wooden "Glaze" Toaster decide to tackle the genre of gospel music. However, as always in my works, things don't go as planned. Rated "T" 'cause I always do.
1. Conception

**A/N: Just something I wrote based on a comment I wrote on FIMFiction... Nope, I still don't know why Vinyl would play jazz.**

**TWO BEST FRIENDS PLAY GOSPEL  
****Part I: The Conception  
****Partially inspired by _The Snow On Her Cheek_ and _It Takes A Foal To Raise A Family_ by psp7master**

ABluSkittle was getting annoyed. As in very annoyed. Waiting outside a door gets him very annoyed. "They've been in there for hours!" he complained. "What are they!? Bucking?"

"They're creating art!" BronyDanceParty hissed, giving ABluSkittle the look of deth.

"It doesn't take this long to create house stuff like they normally do," ABlueSkittle argued.

"Speaking of house stuff, why haven't you been writing any?" BronyDanceParty shot back.

"Because I write stuff with THEM," ABluSkittle explained, "and if THEY don't write anything, then I can't write anything."

"There is logic in what you say..." BronyDanceParty admitted. "But you can't rush genius!"

"The Living Tombstone uses way too much autotune and Glaze sounds like a text-to-speech simulator,"ABluSkittle said flatly.

BronyDanceParty gasped in shock. "You dare insult them!?"

"Hey, just because I work with them does not mean I had to like them," ABluSkittle snapped. "Same goes for you, ya flank-kisser."

"I do not kiss flank!" BronyDanceParty seemed to be a little upset at ABlueSkittle's comment.

"Yes you do! They could walk out of there and say the most stupid bucking thing in Equestria and you would still compliment them!"

Suddenly, just that happened: The Living Tombstone and Wooden "Glaze" Toaster came out from the room they were hiding in. I love the rules of comedy.

"We have finally come up with something!" The Living Tombstone announced. "On a side note, buck you ABlueSkittle."

"How-"

"It's not a very thick door," Glaze explained. "And we do have ears."

"But I have to admit, that flank-kissing thing is kind of true," The Living Tombstone admitted.

"Hurtful!" BronyDanceParty was upset again.

The Living Tombstone rolled his eyes and continued talking to ABlueSkittle: "Anyways, we got stumped and didn't know what to write, so we decided to take a listen to our previous material. And it kind of all sounds the same."

"He's referring mainly to his work," Glaze clarified.

"Hey, I'm talking about yours as well," The Living Toaster said. "You're the one who wrote about the Rainbow Factory twice."

"Well..." Glaze began, but couldn't think of anything.

"Anywho," The Living Tombstone continued, "we decided to try experiment with our music and try a different genre of music."

"Different genre?" ABluSkittle echoed, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, I just said that," The Living Tombstone nodded. "Don't copy me."

"I won't," ABluSkittle said sarcastically. "Now, humour me, what genre did you pick?"

"Gospel," Glaze replied.

"I was supposed to say that," The Living Tombstone muttered.

"I know," Glaze said back with a smile.

There was a little quiet.

"Gospel?" ABluSkittle repeated, going back on his promise. "You're... You're going to make a gospel song?"

"No, we're going to make a gospel album," Glaze said matter-of-factly.

More silence before ABluSkittle broke it. "Y-you can't do that."he told the two artists that weren't BronyDanceParty. "You just can't."

"We can't experiment?" Glaze enquired. "Why can't we?"

"You have firmly established yourselves as house artists!" ABluSkittle stated.

"And?" The Living Tombstone and Glaze asked at the same time.

"AND, because of how you've established yourself, they expect you to release HOUSE, not some stupid gospel crap!" ABluSkittle said. He sounded angry for some reason.

"While that might be true..." The Living Tombstone began.

"Hey, they can write whatever they want!" BronyDanceParty butted in.

"You see? This is exactly what I mean about him being a flank kisser!" ABluSkittle said to The Living Tombstone and Glaze.

That comment caught BronyDanceParty a little off guard. And guess what that made him? "I was just defending them..." he said.

"Mm-hm... But anyways..." ABluSkittle said, quickly brushing BronyDanceParty off. "You two! You... You cannot write gospel music!"

"Hey, I said we're experimenting," Glaze reassured ABlueSkittle. "No need to get your knickers in a twist."

"But you singing gospel is like Vinyl playing jazz!" ABluSkittle retorted.

"Oh, youd didn't hear about Vinyl releazing a jazz-house album with some kind of alternate universe version of herself?" The Living Tombstone asked.

ABluSkittle blinked. "What?"

"Yeah, it's not that bad," Glaze said. "I especially like their cover of 'Waters Of Nazareth'."

"Really? 'Stop Playing Rock 'N' Roll' is also pretty good," The Living Tombstone mused.

"Eh, too smooth for m-"

"I give up!" ABluSkittle suddenly shouted, stopping the two artists' pretty pointless conversation. "Write whatever you want, but I'm not taking any part in it!"

And with that, he flew off in a huff, muttering to himself about checking out Vinyl's electro jazz album on iTunes.

"Aw, damn, he was supposed to produce it," The Living Tombstone said to nopony in particular.

"'Tis a mighty shame..." Glaze agreed. "We also needed him to co-write some stuff."

The Living Tombstone thought about that for a few seconds before saying, "I'm still giving a writing credit."

"Yeah, but what about the producer thing?" Glaze enquired.

"Um... Buck, didn't think about that..." The Living Tombstone murmured. "Hmmm... Hey, BronyDanceParty, you want to produce an album?"

"I guess I could do that," BronyDanceParty said.

"Good, we need 27,838 bits," The Living Tombstone informed BronyDanceParty.

"27,838 bits?!" BronyDanceParty exclaimed.

"Now you're doing it..." The Living Tombstone said. That remark was ignored.

"This stuff costs a lot of bits," Glaze explained. "You think stuff like this is cheap? And it's not just computers this time; we got get actual ponies on this!"

"I didn't say I wasn't going to do this-" BronyDanceParty tried to start a sentence.

"Then do it!" The Living Tombstone said. "I don't mean to be rude, but if you're going to do this, then do it!"

"Um..."

"Well, enough of that, I guess. C'mon, Glaze, let's write this thing!" And with that, The Living Tombstone and Glaze went back into their writing room and locked the door behind them. Then Glaze quickly unlocked it, closed the door, then locked it again.

"...Well, time to go check out my bank account," BronyDanceParty said, wandering off.

**A/N: ...Still don't know why Vinyl would play jazz. Bonum nocte et fortuna, I guess.**


	2. Writing I

**TWO BEST FRIENDS PLAY GOSPEL  
Part II: Writing I  
Written by That Gamer  
Partially based off of _The Snow On Her Cheek_ and _It Takes A Foal To Raise A Family _by PSP7Master**

"OK, now for my favourite part of the album," The Living Tombstone said sarcastically, sitting down. "The writing process!"

"I adore this part as well," Glaze agreed with the same tone.

The Living Tombstone nodded and took a moment to think over his song choices. "So, what ideas do you have?" he asked Glaze.

"Really? You came into a writing session with no ideas?" Glaze sighed.

"I thought you'd have some!" The Living Tombstone argued.

Glaze sighed and took a sip of the drink she had brought.

"Hey, don't be mad at me!" The Living Tombstone snapped.

"I'm not mad at you," Glaze sighed, moving her hoof in a circle, "I'm just frustrated. We decide to do a new genre of music and you don't even know what we're writing!"

"You're supposed to write some, too," The Living Tombstone reminded his cohort.

"...You got me there," Glaze admitted. "Now, onto the actual writing..."

"Right!" The Living Tombstone exclaimed. "Um... Let's see..."

"We should probably take a second to think of something," Glaze told The Living Tombstone.

And so the two did. Eventually, The Living Tombstone came to a conclusion.

"Hey, you heard of that album, _...And Fashion For All_?" The Living Tombstone asked.

"Of course... I'm not a big fan of thrash, but I have heard of it," Glaze responded, kind of seeing where this was going. "What are you...?"

"We check the news!" The Living Tombstone exclaimed, standing up. "Yes! A bold, new, political direction for us!"

"I thought was an experiment," Glaze said.

The Living Tombstone sat down. "Right..." he said with a small sigh. "Can we still do this news thing?"

"Do we have to watch PNN?" Glaze asked back.

"No..."

"Fine. We'll do this, but no overly political stuff," Glaze said with a nod. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna get a few newspapers." And with that, she got up and went for the door. "And you better now drink my Moonlit Dew while I'm gone!"

"Don't worry, I won't!" The Living Tombstone reassured Glaze, laughing a little.

Glaze was skeptical, but it wasn't a very big deal, so she left to go fetch some newspaper.

While she was gone, The Living Tombstone scribbled down a couple of ideas on a sheet paper. These included "Random romance song", "Coffee maker?", "Something about Luna", "Something about Celestia to balance it out" and "Rainbow Factory remake!". About an hour later, The Living Tombstone had written on nearly half the sheets of paper the had brought. Glaze also came back then, with a stack of newspaper on her back.

"Coming up with ideas without me, eh?" Glaze enquired in a teasing manner.

"Hey, I can come up with ideas on my own!" The Living Tombstone said defensively.

"I know you can," Glaze chuckled, putting the newspapers on the table and sitting down. "But I thought we were writing this thing together."

"We are! It's just..." The Living Tombstone tried to explain.

"Hey, look, I'm kidding," Glaze told The Living Tombstone.

"I know you are," The Living Tombstone admitted.

Glaze gave The Living Tombstone the "Oh you!" face and picked up a newspaper. "So, what are we gonna write first?"

"You already asked that question," The Living Tombstone said, "and I think we should write the single first, then write the album filler."

"Why can't we just write an album?" Glaze wondered aloud.

"Because ponies will hear the song, love it and then buy the album with the intent of listening to the one song," The Living Tombstone explained.

"So, basically, we only have to put effort into about.. 8.3% of the album," Glaze said.

"I guess," The Living Tombstone shrugged. "So, what should we call it?"

Glaze leaned back in her chair, but then came up with it. "'(I) Wanna Remember You'," she said. "Every album needs a generic love song and this will be it."

"Why's it called 'I Wanna Remember You'?" The Living Tombstone asked.

"No, no, no, it's pronounced '(I)'," Glaze corrected The Living Tombstone.

"'(I)'?", The Living Tombstone repeated.

"I swear, there's an echo in here," Glaze muttered, getting down to writing.

"You never answered my... Eh, whatever." The Living Tombstone was about to ask something, but quickly forgot about it and got down to writing.

So they got down to writing... For about ten minutes.

"What have you written?" Glaze enquired, shuffling her papers so they were straight.

"A three note loop we can abuse to death," was The Living Tombstone's reply. "You?"

"Two verses and a chorus we can loop," was Glaze's reply.

"One song down!" The Living Tombstone proclaimed, slamming a hoof down on the table. "And we acted like it was _hard_ to write music!"

"We still have 11 other songs to write," Glaze reminded her cohort.

"Yeah, but at the rate we wrote this...!" The Living Tombstone said.

"There is the potential that we could write the entire album here," Glaze sighed, "but we still have to record the songs... And, maybe, just maybe, we should put actual effort into the filler."

"Effort?!" The Living Tombstone exclaimed. "But I just said that we shouldn't!"

"No... You didn't," Glaze said.

"I didn't?"

"No, you did not," Glaze told The Living Tombstone. "Anyways, I think we should write at least two more. We don't want to strain ourselves, right?"

"Right..." The Living Tombstone mumbled.

"Anywho, let's see what these newspapers hold," Glaze said before picking up a newspaper.

The colt opposite from her shrugged and picked up his own newspaper.

"'Plumber Goes To Space'... 'Memory Improvement Proven To Be Scam'..." The Living Tombstone read to herself. "'Molestia Turns Out To Be A Clone'... 'Lyra Continues To Believe Conspiracy Theories'... 'Monkey Plays For Mad Cash'... 'Alternate Universe Found, Twilight A Pegasus'?"

"That sounds interestingly stupid," Glaze commented, still looking at her paper.

"And like something we would write," The Living Tombstone added.

"Exactly," Glaze nodded. "Hey, here's something I found." She cleared her throat and read, "'Language Barrier Prevents Stallion For Ordering At McDonald's'!"

"Ooo! We could also write about that!" The Living Tombstone said happily. "What languages did he speak?"

"...Spanish and Latin," Glaze replied, reading off the paper.

"So a retarded Sun King?" The Living Tombstone offered.

"Pretty much..." Glaze said, throwing away the paper. "Let's get down to writing these..."

"Actually, I was thinking I could write my own song," The Living Tombstone said, it eventually devolving into a mumble.

"So you really wanna write without me?" Glaze gasped in shock, putting a hoof to her chest.

"It's just a suggestion!" The Living Tombstone exclaimed, putting her own hooves up.

"Dude, calm down..." Glaze said boredly. "I'm not gonna kill you over it."

"Oh thank Faust!" The Living Tombstone sighed.

"However..." Glaze continued.

The Living Tombstone blinked. He didn't know where this was going.

"I want to write my own song since I really never," Glaze went on. "We can collab on the rest, but I want to write one."

"Why do you get to write your one?" The Living Tombstone whined.

"Again, I never really write my own," Glaze repeated herself. "I'm always collabing with somepony. Let me have this."

"Alright..." The Living Tombstone grumbled. "But you have to let me have your Moonlit Dew!"

"I have no problem with that; I just realized this stuff sucks," Glaze said, hoofing it over to The Living Tombstone.

"Thanks," The Living Tombstone said. He grabbed it and took a big swig.

"Your poison," Glaze commented, getting down to her writing.


End file.
